Do you have a dream?

The Lord recently reminded me about my prayers and 'vision' for the young adults ministry. I've only shared this with a few people.... usually when pressed for an answer! People have asked me about my dreams for the Young Adults' Fellowship. I remember sharing that I would like to see a young adults' service, and envisioned about 800 to 1,000 people in that service. It's probably not much of a vision, considering the size of our church. It will be a very cool and relaxed service, with TV ministry and all (at that time, FGA has not launched into shooting and recording of our services or even special events). Nevertheless, YAF was numbering in the region of 70-80 and thus to think of running our own service seem like a mammoth task. I brought this vision in prayer before the Lord and committed it to Him. I did not press the issue or sat down to draw up a game plan for achieving this.

I recall times when I would be so overwhelmed by the sheer responsiblity of shepherding this group He's placed under my care. It scared me to think of the eternal consequences if I 'failed' to do my part. I was so aware of my own inadequacy and couldn't help feeling He had picked the wrong candidate for this job. Often the only thing I could do was to throw myself at His mercy and begged Him for wisdom and grace to respond to His call. I knew I was not working, and cannot work, in my own strength. Of course, I also do not work alone but with a very excellent, committed and God-loving team. I am grateful for His sustenance and their support these past few years.

One thing I had to learn was to trust Him who is the author of each of our faith. It's not something I can nor should try to control. Each person has a personal responsibility for responding to God or rejecting Him. Sure it breaks my heart to see some falling away. In fact that's been one of the things that have greatly troubled me from my days in youth ministry, that is to see Christians who were on fire, strong and even serving as leaders, fall away. I don't always understand and I definitely don't care to judge. However I know it is very painful for me to see that and my prayer always is that they will one day return to the Lord. Yet the Lord has also shown me how some who used to be walking in rebellion in their youth have in recent years, turned around and are serving God fervently.

Looking back, I think the 'strategy' the Lord gave me was to look at each person as an individual. I don't know what I was suppose to 'do' but I remember my brother telling me ... simply love them. I did the best I knew how, to care, to offer my listening ear, at times, offer my 2 cents worth. Basically it is about being there for that one person and hoped that I can in a small sense, incarnate the presence of God with them in moments when it really matter. I realised that through these years, it was not the 'vision' that kept me going, but rather the fact that my desire is to see each one of them walking with the Lord and that I would not lose anyone of them (yi ge to bu nen sao - not one less!) Well, even with Jesus, one fell away so I don't expect to be greater than my Master. These past few years, I am grateful for the the opportunity to connect with different individuals although I know I must have missed out some. I was not able to connect with as many and in as much depth as I would have liked to, and for that I am truly sorry. It was not my intention to discriminate and I know I have failed many . I hope these will be able to find a place in their heart to forgive me for my shortcomings and failures. Nevertheless, this group will always have a very special place in my heart and remain very dear to me.

I think it is this latter concern that none should fall away that has kept me going, more than the vision of seeing a large young adult service. Yet today, that vision has come to pass somewhat although I can't be there see it for myself. That's ok, cause I have already seen it in my heart for the past few years. I know the conditions are not ideal and may even be very trying at times. Like all pioneering work, there will be season of ploughing, sowing and planting but I know all these too will only last for a season. It's not an exclusively young adult service, but it is something better... more than what I had imagined. There's an integration of younger ones, like those who are studying and will be joining the marketplace soon. This will also be a great place for those who in their 30s or so, those who are married and others to catch up. It may not always seem that way, but I believe this service has tremendous potential ... because of the potential of the people who make up this service and the potential of what God can do in, through and among them!